When I worked, I worked full time. My husband didn't work. He says he worked from home and for his own company. Granted that was true but as anyone who has dealt with their own business before know, when you work for your own business you are really spending the first few years working with no pay and building a reputation and a foundation for your business to grow and become profitable.
I did this for YEARS! I was the big cheese. I worked to pay for things. To afford things. To have and build a life for my family.
Now not only did I work outside of the home I also worked in the home. Meaning, I cooked (80% of the time and the other 20% was spent eating out). I cleaned (except the bathroom(s), I don't do bathrooms), I did the day to day pick up and laundry of the house. When we moved to Portland I did all of this along with picking 1 to 2 kids up from school and did nearly all the grocery shopping. My husband did sick kid pick ups as well as doctor appointments since his schedule was more "flexible."
So essentially my husband "worked from home," met Big Red at the bus stop, took the kids to random doctor appointments and picked up the kids from school if they became ill. When Crash was teeny tiny he stayed home with her part time once I returned to work. That is basically it. Unless I directed him to do laundry or to defrost or start cooking something he did nada.
Now that i'm home full time, it only took a couple months before it hit me that I did many of the "jobs" around the house and worked full time. And the jobs around the house are nearly a full time job. And in the 6-9 months or so I not only do that but I also volunteer at the kids school, took Crash out of full time daycare and she spends more time than not with me, we go to mommy & kid classes, play dates and I pick the kids up from school and/or meet them at the school bus every day. This also goes along with all sick pick ups, doctor appointment and all errands.
It's tough for me to wrap my mind around how much I used to do while holding a full time job to support my family! My husband works full time now. I pretty much forced him into a job once my severance pay ended. It's an okay job with decent pay but doesn't sustain us in the same way my salary did. Im just thankful he has a job. But honestly he doesn't do jack around the house nor does he spend much time with the kids. He rolls in around 6:30pm on average and we go straight into dinner. Twice per week he picks Crash up from daycare and rolls in this late. It sucks! He does not need to do any house jobs because it's always done by me during the day. This includes taking out the trash on trash night and bring the cans back in!
When he complains about work being tiring, or being exhausted from the week. I laugh hysterically on the inside. Ha! Work being tough! If I only had work and no house jobs I would have been ecstatic. I complained about being tired and often fell asleep early but I had good reason. Guys are pussy's through and through, or at least my guy acts like it. Okay, that's mean. He's a winer and I haven't been unemployed long enough to have pity for his exhausted ass. I bring up the fact that he does jack around the house because I do it all. All I ask is he tuck the kids in at night since he barely spends time with them during the week.
He tries to scold or enforce rules that have no bearing on their daily life because he doesn't get to experience it. He constantly has work on his mind which is lame. They don't pay enough to have him thinking about work when he's not in the office.
His complaining is useless because frankly I don't care much about it. Yes he's the bread winner now but with my unemployment and other things I'm right up on his ass in pay. It's petty and uncouth to be talking about this but frankly i'm fed up. If I only had to go to work and come home and not have been held responsible for other things I wouldn't have had anything to complain about or had fallen asleep early at times. I would have enjoyed my limited time with kids every evening.
Okay i'm just venting and nobody really wants to hear this.