11.09.2010

The best laid plans

I had a plan. I've always had a plan.

i knew i wanted to go to college. A college NOT in Hawaii. I applied to NYU, Columbia and Evergreen! Huh? yep Evergreen, because they didn't give grades. The other two because I wanted to move to NYC.

needless to say i didn't have the grades for NYU and columbia. I did get into Evergreen. i deferred for a year. moved in with my boyfriend and worked and saved.

one year after graduating high school I moved to WA (T came along for the ride). I dropped out of Evergreen a few weeks in. took a semester off and then changed school. I stayed in WA for 3-years; i had been with T for 4 years.

We moved to Chicago. Sometime during Chicago the thought of marriage and babies crossed my mind but I was not in any mental state to deal with life changes, like that. Plus I was having to much fun. We talked about it though.

I think T would have gotten married sooner rather than later. I always had a reason.

First I had to finish college.

When I graduated I didn't want to marry until I had a job.

We moved to LA. He proposed. Eventually I found a job. We got married.

When it was time for babies. I said i needed to feel like I had a permanent job....i won't say career because that's not what i was aiming for. A few years after getting married, and I was still at the same job we talked babies.

Soon after I got pregnant and Big Red was born. My plan was falling into place. It was never about money it was about feeling secure in my life.

Fast forward....we now have 3 babies. Once we had #1 it was all downhill. It wasn't about planning out the future. We knew how to raise a baby, we were comfortable with ourselves, we were happy with our lives.

As much as you can plan and try to stick to it the best things happen when it happens. After baby #2 I said no more. I'm done. But never say never because nearly 4 years after having #2 I had #3 and she's changed my life. No regrets.

No regrets Ever.




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