The List

My List for the next week (possibly more cause I can be a slacker)

Sweep, mop and vacuum
Clean the bathroom
Finish folding laundry
Go through "other" freezer for various items to make for dinner
Look online for a red v-neck sweater or cardigan for the cooler weather
Go through t-shirt drawer and fold and discard so drawer will close
Tidy up patio and discard old, broken down sandbox
Plan with mom for Friday's arrival
Mention (again) to T that he needs to fax medical insurance forms in
Pick up dry cleaning

Could be worse.

I just found out one of my great-aunts is really sick and will most likely not pull through. When I was a bit younger I was very close to her. While living in Washington I would visit her all the time. She lived in Orange County. She was my grandmothers older sister. A lot of my family, especially my grandma, thought my aunt and I were very similar in so many ways. She too, left Hawaii at a relatively young age for the "mainland." She was an awesome lady and led an exciting life in 60s Hollywood. She was this hostess at a pretty hip bar/restaurant catering to the likes of Sinatra and what now. She did some amazing pin up modeling during that time and the photographs were amazing. In the 70s she opened this crazy beauty parlor, all decked out in gaudy, drippy quasi 60s-70s decor. Ornate mirrors and chandeliers galore. I loved visiting here. T and I would make the 20+ hour drive on school vacations to hang out at her place, lounging in the hot tub drinking her crazy alcoholic concoctions. She totally rocked! Then on one visit I bought a pink 100 Sport Vespa and she thought I lost my mind. She didn't understand how I had that kind of cash lying around ($500) and wouldn't here my explanation. It was easier for her to accuse me of taking it from my parents, so be it. I wasn't going to argue, it really wasn't worth it to argue with someone who clearly wasn't into listening. We decided to cut our visit short and headed back to Washington. My grandmother straightened everything out with her and we were all on good terms or so I thought. We had planned another visit months later. We had the plans squared away with my aunt and uncle. Then days before we were ready to leave she called and suddenly had plans. To this day I don't think she did and at the time my grandma didn't think she had plans either. After that I rarely spoke to my aunt. She eventually sold her house in California and moved to Las Vegas. Fast forward 13 years later, I get an email last night, from my mom saying my aunt has been battling cancer. She is back in California and my uncle says it is terminal and her days are numbered. My mom asked me if I wanted to visit this weekend since she knew we were close. I don't know. I want to see her and say goodbye but I am very uncomfortable around the terminally ill. I don't really know what to say. Or how to react. Im thinking about it. I didn't get to say goodbye to my grandma when she died years ago. I was living in Chicago when that happened and flew home for the funeral but nobody really told me just how bad it was just that she was getting some help and had months to live and then suddenly, poof, she passed away. I feel like this is my chance in a way. Im getting a bit teary eyed replaying things in my head right now. Stopping.

1 comment:

  1. I am sorry about your grandmother, Amber. I was devastated when my grandfather died after we moved to Texas, and I didn't know how bad it was until it was too late to get back to Hawaii and see him alive again. The same thing happened with Ben's grandmother last year, and now we're paranoid, everytime sometime gets sick, we're worried won't get to see them again. I don't know how your great-aunt is feeling, how present or clear-thinking she is, but just being there for a bit might brighten her day, and that way you have no unfinished business lingering.